Feelings, Nothing More Than Feelings

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It’s amazing, you have kids and your outlook on life most certainly changes. You view the world quite different;y than you did prior to having to take care of another, entire human life. You would think it would be quite the game-changer, and it darn well is. You worry more, about little things like drafty kitchens, but also big things like the US deficit and the threat of Russia menacing the Ukraine and how that affects us. You worry when they have a sniffle and you get a wet eye when you see a sort of sappy show or commericial (guilty). It’s everything you would think it would be, and probably more. You beam when they start to talk or when they score a goal.  Conversely, you get over-the-moon irate at the smallest little things. Your emotions go in both directions at the drop of a hat. It’s really manic and must be somewhat like what a schizophrenic feels like (kind of…don’t get all crazy on me saying it’s a serious thing).

You feel intense spikes of love and concern when something really significant, especially when tragic, happens to someone you know, or even someone you may not know all that well or at all. For a short time, you really appreciate everyhing a little bit more, enjoy them a little bit longer than normal. Of course, for some sad reason, it never seems to stick. You forget how grateful you are and how overall pretty darn good your life really is. You forget for some reason that others have it a little bit (or quite a bit) worse than you do, and that we really should appreciate it all and thank God for what we have. It was nice while it lasted, but then, at some point sooner than it should, you fall back into getting frantic or really agitated and things that really aren’t all that bad, not really that important. Seriously…so what they left the light on in the bedroom, or wasn’t really concentrating when doing math homework (who would, it stinks). You fall back into the normal, ungrateful, somewhat spoiled by your pretty good life rut…and it’s a shame. I do it all the time, though I am truly trying to enjoy it all a bit more, as much as I can, while I can.

You never know how long anything will last, stupid ISIS, but I think it’s really important to try your best to be happy for what you have. I am not being pious and am not on my high horse, I’m just telling you what I try to tell myself…it’s a shame the tragedies don’t make you mushy for just a little bit longer.

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